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Forum posts for pick up lines

Posted by Miguel on Feb 05, 2004
I dont really think pick-up lines are meant to work. I mean its all fine and good when Will Smith is all like "YOU'VE BEEN RUNNIN THROUGH MY MIND ALL DAY GURRRRRRL" and you laugh and think about how hot Hillary Banks is but then you get scared because you realize that little Ashley is actually all grown up and hotter than Hillary.

Wait what was I talking about?

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.


here we go....
Posted by weberm1 on Feb 05, 2004
oh god, men using pick up lines are great. i have experienced some pretty funny ones in the past. not that i get hit on alot, but ya know what i mean.
here's one i thought was great. i was at a bar in barrie, where all the girls wear little slutty clothes and hooker boots, so i always look/feel out of place in my jeans and t-shirt outfits. i got: "are you avril lavigne's sister?" i just looked at the guy and started laughing.
i have experienced others, but am actually too embarrassed to write them down, as they are pretty crude and disgusting. i've also had random dudes grab me in places they should not be touching. like, inner thigh. why do guys think that is appropriate or acceptable? do i look like the kind of girl that would enjoy that? and what did he expect in return? boys are weird.
or there are the men who see four or five girls dancing together, having a good time, and think they can penetrate that group and grind with them all? what? no...
pick up lines i have used:
to old roommate christine "hey baby, i have a mattress in the back of my pick up truck" and it was funny cause we were moving, and i did have one. we then proceeded to jump on it, and have her mom take a picture of her stradling me. so, i guess that one worked.
i also find grabbing ass rather affective. give it a shot people, but be smooth about it. 'the slide and grab' or the 'trip and grab' are good moves. shit, it's how i got john and now we live together. go, do some experiments in the name of science!

Posted by Miguel on Feb 05, 2004
A friend of mine actually had a drunk guy go up to her and say something along the lines of "can I fuck your tits please?". Luckily for him, he picked the one girl in the universe that wouldn't just knee him in the balls and spit on him for good measure.

She just thought it was funny.

Sex = Math
Posted by Blur on Feb 05, 2004
Again.. for you math lovers...

Sex is just like math. You ADD the bed, SUBTRACT the clothes, DIVIDE her legs...... and MULTIPLY

Personal Favourite Pick Up Line:
(she must be wearing a shirt that reveals her stomach)
Excuse.. I think you have a great belly button, do you mind if I touch it? Thank you, maybe later tonight I could touch it from the inside???

Posted by weberm1 on Feb 05, 2004
ok, most graphic pick-up line i have ever heard. some guy comes up to me, as i'm crossing the dance floor of my favourite establishment, and actually says 'baby, you could bruise my balls with those hips'.......
oh god, just thinking about it makes me shudder.
and i'm left standing, confused and wondering, is that a good thing or a bad thing? maybe some of you guys could help me out here, because i still really don't know. my friend blair says it's good, but, i can't imagine having the boys bruised is a pleasurable experience.....

Posted by crux on Feb 05, 2004

i think possibly that he was suggesting that it would be acceptable for you to bruise his balls with those hips. as if to say it would be a fair trade. bruised balls in exchange for those hips. now, i'm not entirely sure how those hips would be coming into contact with his balls. the logistics of that maneuver are beyond me at the time. however; i am attempting to get drunk, so that could be impairing my creative thought processes.

Posted by MDuffy on Feb 05, 2004
Two guys go up to 2 girls:
one says
"excuse me, my friend and I are having troubles getting a solution to a bet we just made, we were wondering if you ladies could help"

"What kind of bet"

"Well we were just betting on how much a polar beer weighs"

"We have no idea"

At this time the girl gives some stupid ridiculous answer and asks
"What do you guys think"

"Just enough to break the ice, my name is Duffy"
Extend hand for formal greeting.

Posted by kris on Feb 05, 2004
So i just got back from the pub and I had to add this one to the list.....

"Damn girl! You've got ticket writen all over you, cuz you are fine, fine,fine!"

....and weberm1, in response to your first post, I know exactly how you feel. Sometimes there are the funny guys and then there are the nasty guys....
example (*note, this is VERY raunchy)
I was walking through the bar and it was very crowded. As I was approaching the bar I suddenly felt something very cold press up against my inner thigh, and moving upwards.... Freaked out, I stepped back to see a guy pull his beer away from my unmentionalbles.... "Baby, if you wanted a drink all you had to do was since you're getting one anyways, how about grabbing one for me with your number on the side?"
And my response....yup, you got it....that guy got the nicest right hook I could muster up....and then got kicked out of the bar.
Its not let them know can't be nice all the time....

Posted by phduffy on Feb 05, 2004
Well, i'm here.

What are your other two wishes?

Posted by phduffy on Feb 05, 2004
Kris, out of curiousity, where were you when you got the original pick up attempt?
The one about tangents and DE's?

Posted by kris on Feb 05, 2004
I was at a pub on campus....
wish? huh?

Posted by phduffy on Feb 06, 2004
Just curious if you were at the engineering pub or something.

Or anywhere in the city of Waterloo.

Sounds like the type of thing one of my fellow classmates would have tried to do.


Tsk Tsk Tsk
Posted by Miguel on Feb 06, 2004

When will men learn to stop treating women like the beautiful objects they are, and begin to respect and acknowledge them as equals.

But seriously, even when a pick-up line is funny women don't fall for it do they? Im genuinely curious....I mean there must be better ways of striking up a conversation with those of the opposite sex. Have any ladies here ever given the time of day to a guy who used a pick-up line on them?

I wish I was your tear...born in your eyes, live in your cheeks and die on your lips.

yes, indeed.
Posted by weberm1 on Feb 06, 2004
miguel, to answer your question, i have given some guys the time of day with pick up lines. it's all about sincerity for me. well, and the line that's in use. i once had a rather attractive man tap me on the shoulder at a bar. when i turned around i think his line was something like 'i told myself i would have your name by the end of the night' lame and cheesy, i know, but something about HIM made it work. he got my name, and not my fake one that i usually give to the creepy guys. i think it was the fact that he looked horribly shy approaching me, and he was a guy that i would notice on my own (crazy hair, facial piercings). ended up dating him for a couple of months. so, boys, be sincere, and don't go grabbing women, that's not cool. use whatever line may be funny, or corny, but just be somewhat sincere and cute about it. worked on me and i'm usually pretty mean in those types of situations.

"would you like to buy a hammer?"
Posted by Numinous on Feb 06, 2004
I find that handing a girl a pen pulling up your shirt and telling them to sign away seems to work well...... it seems to work even better in large groups of women... I'm not to sure how that started but it seems to work somehow....

it was ME!!
Posted by weberm1 on Feb 06, 2004
schaus, that started with me, so i think i deserve a thank you for all of those phone numbers. you wanted mine, but had no pen, so i used your chest. and the ladies LOVED it. it must be that sweet ass......

no lie
Posted by Numinous on Feb 06, 2004
yes my dear I do thank you

no lie at least three times a week I have a girl come up to me and say to me "I have a hole I need filled"

Oh my
Posted by Nerhael on Feb 06, 2004
Oh....they just walk into that one.... How often do you manage to keep a straight face?

its hard brother
Posted by Numinous on Feb 06, 2004
nine years let me cover it up pretty well....
what is really hard is when guys send in there girlfrinds to pick up a "cock and ball" for the toilet..... girls becareful of this one its called a ballcock... which isnt much better now that I think about it.

Filling holes.
Posted by mike on Feb 06, 2004
You do of course offer them some caulk to fill thier hole right?

I have been thinking for a while now and my work doesn't seem to offer a lot of amusing pick up lines. Either that or I am horribly un-creative today.

"Wow, I'd sure love to bolt your plate... huh, huh, huh." (the huh, huh's are there to represent the stupid crap/sounds that would obviously be made after such a statement. You know, for added dirtyness (which must be implied because noone will know what the hell you're talking about).

That's all I got. This is the farthest thing from my area of expertise that I can think of. My best pickup line would be "Hi, I'm Mike.", and that never works.

Posted by mike on Feb 06, 2004
well... almost never.

Posted by crux on Feb 06, 2004
for those of you still in school. i found this on:

"If you were my homework, I would be doing you on the desk right now."