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Forum posts for Advice of the Day for July 21st 2005!

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Posted by bryan on Jul 21, 2005
I'm down with giving advice, as long as my first advice is "don't take any of this advice, its all bullshit."

H & S means ham and salmon, and it was your grocery list last week.

My first piece of advice:

If all you are eating is canned salmon and canned ham, maybe you should try to diversify your diet? That is way too much protein and jellied meat for any one person.

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Posted by vivian on Jul 21, 2005
H&S

Herpes & Syphillis

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Nope
Posted by Miguel on Jul 22, 2005
It's Homos&Sluts

Inductive Reasoning
Posted by mike on Jul 22, 2005
I just can't stand the debate anymore.

We are all aware of Sherlock Holmes and his use of deductive reasoning to solve mysteries and crimes. His method involves taking away all of the answers that can't be correct until you are left with the correct answer. I have a similar method which in actuality is the opposite of Sherlock Holmes... inductive reasoning. I will add all of the correct answers, theby making any incorrect answers a moot point... as you will see my method is much more effecient.

And now I will illustrate the use of inductive reasoning to solve the mystery of "H&S" written on Duffy's hand:

As we all know when you write things on your hand they tend to get smudged. What was actually origionally written was H8S... not &.

Why did he write that? Secondary my hated nostaw...

Obviously H8S is the final portion of a license plate. A vanity plate in fact (explanation later).

Paul witnessed a horrific traffic accident involving a hit and run. From the information Duffy has provided I can infer that what happened was a light blue Ford Windstar travelling Westbound on University Ave. struck a woman who was riding a bicycle. The woman suffered a broken leg in the incident. Since Duffy was a witness to this accident and saw the van driving away he attempted to write down the license plate number, but only got the last 3 digits which he later interpreted to read H&S.

Why did Duffy not remember any of this? Shock. After witnessing this terrible incident Duffy's mind was not able to cope... he went into shock and the memory was wiped from his mind.

Now on to solving the crime. As I mentioned the license palte was in fact a vanity plate. Teh plate actually read JOHN H8S. Which works out to be "John Hates". The driver of the light blue Windstar was in fact Johhny Winkfalter, a well know bigot in the Waterloo area.

Now that the mystery is solved there will be no ned for further debate. Duffy shoul recall his lost memories and contact the Police immediately. While he's at it he should report the bastards that were "coming to get me" last weekend (I got an anonymous phone tip).

Feel free to use inductive reasoning any time is suits your needs.

Woah
Posted by Nerhael on Jul 22, 2005
Mike....that was gold. Pure gold. I loved it.

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Posted by phduffy on Jul 22, 2005
it was for Hide and Seek.

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Posted by phduffy on Jul 25, 2005
Allright Brian, you get all of next week, starting on Tuesday (since Monday's a holiday).

How's that sound?

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Posted by bryan on Jul 26, 2005
it's on BITCHES! are you ready for some horrible ADVICE!?!?!